Looking for a Serious Relationship?

After a string of hot and cold short-term romances, are you finally looking for a serious relationship?  Once you have sown your wild oats, it's natural to want to settle down into the comfort and security that comes with the commitment of a serious relationship.      The difference between a fling and a serious relationship can bring a contentment that no one-night stand can equal.  Granted, you must commit yourself to the relationship and your partner, which means no more playing the field.  The good news is, the variety that you are giving up, is a fair trade off for the advantages of commitment.

• A Chance to Be You: A serious relationship that has survived the fling stage, means you are settled enough to stop trying to make a good impression all the time.  You and your partner have already discovered a few flaws in each other and it didn't dissolve the relationship.  In fact, often it cements it.  Commitment means letting your hair down, getting comfortable and enjoying the freedom to be yourself.
• Common Goals: When you're in a serious relationship, it's natural to want more, and this is generally true for both halves of the couple.  Since you both have your hearts on the line, it stands to reason you both want to make it work.  This leads to commonality in goals and ambitions for the relationship.  If you love someone, you won't feel good having them spend their last dollar trying to impress you.  Stability in the relationships naturally means stability in your personal habits and interactions too.  So it's okay to spend a Friday night watching a tv movie instead of going to a night club.  In fact, at this stage, it's usually welcomed!
• The Pressure is OFF:  Every relationship comes with a certain amount of pressure.  Even couples who've been married for forty years occasionally feel a certain amount of necessity to please their spouse.  However, this weight comes from a desire to please their partner (or possibly avoid annoying their partner), and it gently replaces the "must be absolutely fabulous all the time" burden.  Early in relationships, people feel the need to be "on" constantly, but as the relationship matures and couples gain confidence in both partner's feelings the pressure subsides, allowing each person to let their hair down, relax and be true to themselves.

It's not uncommon for both men and women to run away when a relationship starts to become serious.  The fact is, as the relationship grows, so does the enjoyment and satisfaction that comes from it.  There is no reason to run from vulnerability, since it replaces the shallowness and pretense of early relationships.  Serious relationships allow people to grow, both as a couple and as individuals.   So, if you are looking for a serious relationship, you must be prepared to shed that outer shell and give a little of what's inside.  It is truly the only way you will experience the depth and wonderment that comes when you are close enough to another, that you can just be yourself.